The other night was really hard. I went from disappointment, to anger, to discouragement, to depression and then to suicidal ideations. That is not something I take lightly, so please forgive some of the humor in this post.
But the process of traveling down that long, dark, lonely spiral into the abyss of hopelessness is often amusing to both the victim and outsiders looking in.
I haven’t researched this yet or anything, but it’s my belief that the anxiety/panic associated with a bout of serious clinical depression causes the adrenal glands to pump their serum into the bloodstream. This explains the sudden rush of rage, power and vacuum packed energy that explodes from someone who has spent hours in bed sweating and trembling through depression pain.
Like any good adrenaline rush, once the blazing chemical fades to mere embers in the already tortured brain, the calm comes. Savage beast soothed, the victim is now so mellow as to be almost “high,” in a way, feeling no more mental pain, and is suddenly void of care.